I would never dare be as honest with strangers in person as I am when I write. Maybe a piece of me feels like when I write, it’s really just to myself or for myself, maybe a handful of people. It’s one of the only times I feel I can be truly honest. When I […]
Parenting Advice is Shallow
I’ve never been more aware or more shame-filled of how drastically imperfect I am. My flaws and quirks and and downsides are so highlighted as a Mom. At the same time, though, I see more good in myself than ever. More potential for change, more kindness and patience than I knew I held. Mom is […]
Good Gasoline
To put the last few years simply (which have been anything but), the latter part of my twenties have been about healing and finding inner peace. Recently I’ve learned something that’s been extremely helpful, and frankly, very empowering. This analogy, this imagery, is something I see in my mind every day now. I actually close […]
The Plural of Thief is Thieves
I understand how to write very well. I know that if you go 3-4 (that should be three to four) sentences with a different word starting each sentence, it makes for stronger writing. I know that and yet here we are, using “I” three sentences in a row. You shouldn’t address “you” as it is […]
But What Will They Think?
I worry too much, about everything. The past, the future, what people think. But that’s funny to me, a little ironic even, because there was a time in my life when I couldn’t care less what people thought. Not only did I not care what they thought; I didn’t care if what I did hurt […]
How The Light Gets In
An open letter to my daughters: For years I’ve gone back and forth about what pieces of me I want to share with you. I’ve started blogs and deleted them. I’ve backspaced more than I’ve typed. I even asked my therapist.. is the fact that I’ve seen a therapist something that I share? It should […]
Blakely Ames
We had already gone in for that first exciting ultrasound and everything was measuring perfectly, but a few weeks passed, and one random morning I went to the bathroom and I was spotting. A lot. My heart sank. This isn’t normal, I thought, am I losing the baby? I called the doctor to see if […]
Wildly Free
100 acres. 100 acres of pure, indefinable heaven. All of my teenage years were spent migrating away from there, reaching desperately for freedom, for somewhere bigger and faster and more. “I have to show everyone! I have to be the person who picked her life up and started brand new, somewhere, ANYWHERE that isn’t here.” […]
What Sets Your Heart On Fire
My parents have always pushed me to chase my dreams, and that’s all they pushed me toward. I think only now am I realizing just how rare of a support system that was/is to have. When I went to college (completely my decision), I got to go to the one that I chose, and I […]
Hoop-Dee-Doo
“Hoop-dee-doo, hoop-dee-doo!” Everyone in the restaurant was swinging their napkins around, laughing at the horribly cheesy jokes told by the comedians at the dinner show. It was only appropriate to be there with my Grandpa, given his love for clever, quick-witted, especially cheesy jokes. We were in Disney World, far from our first visit. Every […]